My Person of Everything

In this society of ours each one is expected to satisfy certain criteria to earn the respect of others. Irrespective of rich or poor, North, South, West or East, Hindu, Christian or Muslim, there is a checklist forced on us. Men- they do not have a choice but to be the bread winner of the family. Women on the other hand, are pictured different. Live within the boundaries that our ‘tradition’ lays, decent education in the ‘modern’ days, to get married and have children. Since the very beginning of time, ‘to have children’ is considered a blessing.

Somehow our society is intolerant to the childless. Most of the time men escape the stinging words of those around. It’s usually women who are forced to live through this devastating situation.

They are considered unlucky, disgrace, a symbol of sorrow and despair. Regardless of what a woman has achieved, if she cannot bring forth the next generation; she is null, void. This life of a woman is nothing less than experiencing hell. She has to quietly bear the suffering, fake a smile and continue to carry out her everyday chores.

This life of hell is what my mother experienced for 15 years. After she was married, just like any other woman, she longed for motherhood. But it took a decade and a half for it to happen. These 15 long years couldn't have been easy.

She had to ignore the disgusting stares of those in the family, with a harden heart hear the words of the doctors when they said ‘You will never have a child’, live without a hold in life and struggles every minute which deep down her heart still remains unerased.

I came as an answer to the numerous questions and a source of joy after all the years of hardships. What could be more special to hold me for the first time, her little one, her own. From then to now, her world is spun around me, her dreams became mine and mine are hers. I’m 21 but the bond between us was created 15 years before I first saw the world. The divine bond that unknown to anybody else. 

Certain qualities are taught while few others are inherited. To be tolerant, to be humble, sometimes to let go and sometimes to be a get getter- these weren't taught to me, I acquired rather inherited from her. She has been everything that I could ask for- mentor, critic, teacher, friend and above all my first expert, my mom.

SEEMS LIKE YESTERDAY

Scribbling thoughts can be hard at two instances. First, when thoughts aren't clear or when they are too many. Second is when emotions make words murky. In my case it is the second. Needless to say when one has lived a life that is more a fairy tale.

As a fresh school girl I entered this place, it was indeed strange. The uncomfortable feeling that ruled me cannot be descried. It was the first day at KCT and I was preparing for my orientation session with many hundreds. Each one of us was experiencing the same feeling but all by ourselves. I couldn't have felt lonelier with a thousand people around. I said a prayer that none heard, “God help me survive!” I started my college journey with many warnings and advice. Professors, heads of departments, seniors, semesters, CGPA, arrears, attendance percentage, projects, internships and placements; scary enough for a person who till then lived in a shell.

First few months, I had the typical life of a fresher. Close to thousand students all in one block was both easy and difficult to get introduced to. Classrooms and new friends were good enough for an amazing college life, I misjudged. The first year rolled by, slipped away in front of my eyes.

Second year took a diversion. First interaction with seniors, first experience of being part of clubs and forums, first taste of business and a lot more! When I knew there is recruitment for KCT’s first student startup, I wanted to enroll myself in the recruitment process. Frankly, I wasn’t very keen in business but inquisitive as I am, I wanted to know what it was before saying ‘NO’ and also for the ‘know- how’ of an interview process for all the hype it carries. Happy by chance I was selected as a member of this campus business which was truly more than being a student entrepreneur.

From then on, college was all different. Thanks to those lucky stars for introducing me to a group of friends who gave friendship its style. Within us, we knew no law. Every moment was braided with laughter, chatter, outings and togetherness. Namma café, beyond any question or doubt, you are the reason for many smiles.

The fairy tale doesn’t stop. Fondness to debate, madness to question everything and yearning to learning more- these attributes were favoured by the inception of Qubate Forum. Here again got introduced to so many KCTians, few of them for life.   

Forthwith came numerous responsibilities. With each I grew; I transformed. Department symposiums, a legion of events and endless getting to knows.

Yugam is another special memory. Stretched limits, made me do what I previously considered impossible. Late night working hours, meeting, preparation and most of all getting to meet people for the first time in four years and in very short time becoming great friends- possible only here!

To think, it will soon come to a halt I’m reminded of the little prayer on my first day ‘Help me survive’.

Through these years, I realize that did not just survive; I evolved. While preparing me to face the world this place also gave me numerous recollections to hold on. When will I next play those childish games in class? Will the four-corner hear my nick names? When will I next sit in those café tables? Those last minute internal preparations, unrehearsed seminars, searching for notes, crowded Xerox shops, many hi and hellos on the way, silly jokes and laughter, when next?

Now I have no choice but to step into the cruel world. But college life will always remain irreplaceable.

To each one of you, I just want to say ‘You have made a big difference and you are truly special, Thank you!’

LOOKING THROUGH

In the comfort of my own little space I sat. My world is what I created within the four walls. Caressed and pampered by the loved ones, I found all that I wanted in this world of mine. I started to believe that everything that could possibly exist in the world is what I've seen, I've known and I've experienced.

Just then my attention was drawn to the little window at the farthest corner. The window I've been most familiar with arouse avid thoughts this time. Curiosity called to find out what new could be there through that window. As I looked through, I saw through it. Under the scorching sun, life moved rapidly in front of my eyes. Clearly people did not have time for each other. Those barely 10 years old seem to have a hectic schedule.  A few in rags fight for a living, men and machines on roll, certainly the former was wearier. Nature, routine and life were blended into one. 

No matter how old or young, there is always a special liking for the space beside the window, from classroom to corporate, buses to airplanes we always fight for one, don’t we? But do you see what I see? A whole new world!

Through the window, the farthest foreseeable end of the world for sure should be the beginning of another one. True nature has so much in similar of life and interestingly so much to offer. Between the sky and land, far and wide, above and deep beneath are different classes of people and beings, different nations, culture, history, friends, strangers, different hurdles, goals to reach, all that is known and unknown. I begin to wonder what I’m yet to explore. Rather how little I've explored. It’s funny who we trick ourselves for not experiencing all that we want to; too young, too old, too rich, too poor, too timid, too daring etc. etc.

It is rightly said, ‘A ship is safe at the harbor, but definitely not the reason why it was built’. I might be safest in the world of mine but wouldn't that be a crime to walk past the opportunities that waits, to easily ignore the talents bestowed and to find the place that is destined?

Time to jump out of the window, get set to explore, step outside the world I created for myself and break limits. For whatever reason it was built, thanks to the window that linked the two beautiful worlds. Indeed a few hours well spent and this seems to be the most convincing purpose of it.   

THE CREDIT THAT WASN”T

October 10, 2014 was a day when the world once again looked at our country. But the hype drowned even before the celebration begun. For many of us who celebrate only the award and not the awardee, here is a little I read about him. Mr. Kailash Satyarthi an engineer according to the degree certificates but a true reformer, an activist, a Nobel laureate and an INDIAN.

He works at the grassroots saving thousands of children trapped by child labour. Every child has future. Every child yearns for the liberty to be free and to feel secure. Every child deserves to be celebrated. Believing in this gospel, he didn't stop with thoughts and belief but brought it into action. He is the guardian angel in the lives of many little ones for whom he has modeled an educational and rehabilitation centre. For years now he has been associated with several international organizations and movements fighting for this cause. Nothing comes easy and free. The price he had to pay was endless attacks and threats and uncertain survival.

Recipient of Germany’s Aachener International Peace Award, but not a German, Robert F. Kennedy award but a Non- American, Gold medal from the Italian senate, recognition from Spain, Netherlands and many more countries. But it needed a Nobel Peace Prize for us to turn back and look at this superstar of our own soil. 

        

Why didn't the media that updated us about the trending cricket news bring him to our notice as much as it should have? Why he and his work weren't the topic of discussion during our casual chats rather we spoke about a great deal about the latest movie released and the happening TV shows? Controversies in various forms are featured in the front pages of the dailies when there is lot more happening.

Real heroes are those who fight at our borders, are those who toil to see someone’s life change, are those who dream big and do big. Enough said! But how long will we only talk and forward such messages and share it on our timelines? Mr. Kailash is definitely not the only one. There are still many more who deserve a pat on the back- the least we can do.

The world will never fail to applaud your vision, hard work, struggle and the change you've caused. But only after you are successful! Before that you are just another person on the planet who is striving for betterment noiselessly.

All those who want to be a change, before we face the same struggle we better change our society, that is change ourselves.

  

REWIND>> REFORM

1947. It was a year when the world witnessed the rise of a nation. A nation blessed with freedom, heritage, leaders and culture. Dreams, aspirations and hope started taking shape in the lives of thousands.  Every Indian’s mind had a varied yet splendid picture of an independent country and the several decades that lay ahead of them.

Deep South in a small town, visionaries where scripting the future of India even before its Independence. With the far sighted vision, courage and determination that the soil implants into its people even without ones knowledge the leaders of the century fore saw Coimbatore as an industrial hub. They believed the strength of a nation did not lie in swords and riffles, courage and bravery was not about bloodshed, not gold or the precious stones buried deep down that can make a nation prosperous. Their ideology was different and thus making them leaders that the city will never forget.

The warriors of the 20^th century realized the potential of the parched land and its black soil. G.D. Naidu- an inventor, innovator and engineer. The pride of the city is also called the ‘Edison of India’. From electrical to mechanical, agriculture and automobile, industries founded by him are spread across sectors. He is the pioneer in transforming Coimbatore into an industrial city.

‘Medals, degrees and diplomas do not make a man genius’. Get to know more about him to understand the truth in this statement.   

A magnificent journey of one of India’s leading entrepreneur started with The Annamalai bus travels- P.Nachimuthu Gounder. Today, Sakthi Groups speaks the legacy that was left behind by him. A legacy that is now carried forward by Dr. N. Mahalingam- an educationalist, industrialist, a reformer and a notable person in the Kongu region.  

G.R. Damodaran Naidu who believed education deals with developing a healthy spirit in an effective behaviour. The GRD group of Institutions was thus altering the viewpoint towards education.

Coimbatore has given to the country many other leaders and reformers like G.K. Naidu of Lakshmi mills, Swamikannu Vincent- the man behind the Central Studios and never to forget the English man Sir Robert Stanes. When the majority was passive, they chose to fly, to lay the foundation of Coimbatore and thereby the nation strong.

When passion and skill meet the result is no less than a revolution. Coimbatore today stands as a testimony to this abandoned truth.  We today boost of living in the Manchester of South India, a land of opportunities, a land where the goodness of nature joins hand with the spirit of entrepreneurship. It is the dreams of those few who do not know how to quit that we are living today.

The life of every leader has one factor in common. Not one worked for fame or power but in all they did was to challenge the impossible, portray immense strength of character and turn obstacles into opportunities.  Most of all, the best leaders history has ever known have ensured to get things done by knowing what has to be left undone. It is our time now. To discover what is left undone for us. Take up the challenge with gratitude and create our future and make Namma Coimbatore a better place. Because future is at its best only if we create our own. The journey is not always a struggle if we put our heart, mind and soul into it. When the immense power in every youth can join hands, we can witness obstacles and doubts shattering right in front of our eyes. 

So, what is your step to take your city forward?

What is your contribution for this city of yours?

Ideas do not lead to advancements; it is the implementation that matters.

THE PLACEMENT SYNDROME

There was the time of the year. I realized I was in the final year of college when there were fewer new faces, when my routines changed, when I was a senior to a bigger crowd and had more responsibilities. Most importantly realized it when the placement season dawned and everyone around seemed to be interested in my career and on what I’ll be doing after graduation.

It starts with preparing the resume, trying to identify the areas of interest in spite of knowing I don’t have one. Next big question is the achievements column in the resume.  Trying to recollect a few, that itself an achievement.

On the big day, as I sit along with the many hundreds geared up to face the challenge, a thousand thoughts flash across my mind. Almost every thought is centered on the ones I’m answerable to. I start finding reasons I can possibly tell for not getting through because I do not want to be looked down upon.

Starts the pre- placements talk; irrespective of the company I attend, the talk makes it sound like the best place to kick start my career. I don’t think about the domain the company works with, the job atmosphere, the career growth, whether I will fit in or nothing for that matter. All I want is a job offer.

Each organization has a process and policy of its own for recruitment, most of them starting with the general aptitude. Being aware of this, I start flipping through Dr. R.S. Agarwal’s quantitative aptitude book. Well! For many, it is the bible for quants. With the completion of each round, I sit with anxiety of whether I would clear it, should I continue to prepare for the next phase, should I wait or should I give up. Fingers crossed, I sit not knowing what to expect.

If the result is positive, there is a moment of excitement and happiness which quickly fades and I get ready for the next phase. If it is otherwise, feel dejected and will not want to face the crowd. Worse, if I get through and my friend doesn’t; worse still, if my friend gets through and I don’t.

I’m certain that most of you would have experienced the same. This doesn't stop with one company but continues till the day we win the battle, when we can finally heave a sigh of relief. On that day, in no time, a lurking happiness and abundance captivates us. The rapid thoughts of taking the big step from being a student to a professional, the satisfaction of finding answers to numerous questions and the sense of accomplishment; all of this in a moment.

Pause for a minute, aren't there a lot more to college life. Though placements suck most of our time and energy it’s our choice to create the best memories that can last a life time. For this, the right attitude towards placement is most needed. All of us have our own destiny. Some a little close while a few are at a farther distance and has a long and windy path. But it’s definitely there. Most of the time it is so big that it doesn’t allow us to settle for the ordinary.

It is the final year of college life, let’s make our to-do list. Stop worrying about what others think. Decide on what is needed the most and let go what is unnecessary. Say ‘yes’ to chances because it might not be offered to you again. Even out strained friendships and create new bonds. It is indeed essential to stay focused but getting over-worked without a plan will lead nowhere.

‘Tough times do not last, but tough people do’. When life throws obstacles carve opportunities because success can only be postponed and is never out-of-reach.  

UNDISCOVERED CULTURE

“We want equal rights

We want to be the decision makers

We do not want to be looked down

We want equal opportunities, dignity and respect”

Sounds like the voice of women fighting for her rights?   

You got that wrong, at least if you are in the “Abode of clouds”–Meghalaya. The place which is well known for its natural wonders, the Cherrapunji, the abundant rain and the stretching valleys and lot more, also offers another reason for its fame. It follows a unique culture- a culture that is known to some but spoken by none, a culture that still prevails within the boundaries of the region and a culture that makes the place sound like an alien planet.

In the hilly regions of the North eastern India, a girl child brings cheers to the family and if it is a boy, the family is saddened. Women are decision makers. Husband hands over his salary to the wife. Daughters inherit the ancestral property and not the sons. Men take care of the household work. Children get the mother’s surname. In case of conflicts, the husband is threatened to be thrown out of the house and not the wife. The age old traditions we have be aware of seem to take a diversion in this region.

This culture is called the Matrilineal culture where women are treated well ahead of men. The ancestry is traced through the mother and maternal relations. This culture is prevalent not only in India but in many other regions like Cherokee, Haida, Hopi, Navoji, eastern Sri Lanka, Mosuo of China, Basques of Spain and France.

Though the male member is considered the head of the house, the sole responsibility of managing it lies in the hands of the woman. Some men are accustomed to this culture while a few have adopted it. However, there is certainly a sector of men who crave for a freedom from this tradition. Be it men or women, when treated as the weaker gender, the society is sure to witness a wave of agitation. People of Meghalaya are no exceptions to this. A group of men from this region have formed an organization, Syngkhong Rympei Thymai (SRT). This organization fights for equal rights and opportunities for men. More than twenty five years since inception, the organization is striving to break this social system by which men are forced into a sub ordinate position when compared to women. The battle is still not won.

A few kilometers away from the place, there is a different story. Rather the reality we know. Every day hundreds of women live in a world where their faint voice is lost in the buzz of men sovereignty.    Perhaps, the matrilineal system is not what women wish for. But for sure, every woman wants a society where there is no female infanticide, no dowry, no limitations on the dreams and aspirations of a teenage girl, no restrictions on her attire. When a woman in Meghalaya has the right to be treated with respect, so does every other woman in the other regions of the county. If you think a lot has been done for women; then you got to think again.